Adonis Prison

 

                                                            By Simon Collinson

I was warned this could happen but I just didn’t listen. Just too busy looking at myself to notice. I loved myself so much I could not bear to stop looking at myself in the mirror and taking endless selfies. I would have been alright if I was discreet and private about it but in public I couldn’t help myself.

You see I was just so good looking.

I’d go past a mirror in the pub or restaurant and I’d be there for ages looking at my reflection. I would stop at a shop window to admire myself for hours. I‘d stop strangers and ask them if they agreed with me that I was the best looking person in the room. Someone informed the authorities about me. Naturally there are a lot of jealous people out there who are envious of my handsome looks.

And eventually, I was taken to the court, having been accused of crimes of vanity. The court was packed out. All eyes were on me. I loved every minute of it. The judge found me guilty of vanity on all counts. I had to plead guilty as I am really good looking.

I was given five years in Adonis prison.

Adonis prison was beautiful to look at from the outside like pristine white marble. I was taken in there by hooded guards. I could not see their faces. They wore special glasses. I suppose it was so that they would not feel down when they compared their ugliness to my stunning beauty.

The gate was locked behind me. And it was just empty. Just me in there. That's right, just me. And only me.

Everywhere I looked there were pictures and posters all of me on the walls, windows and doors. There were photographs of me everywhere. In the library all the books had pictures of me on the front, back and every page. In the canteen my picture was on the menu, the cups, plates, bowls on the tables and chairs.

The only thing on TV was my smiling face. The weekly film show was just a picture of me set to the music of Wagner. All the visitors wore masks of my face. The guards and staff all wore masks of my face upon their faces.

My cell was just walls, doors, ceilings and floors of mirrors. Every day I saw reflections of myself and only myself. I thought I looked fantastic.

I was the only inmate of Adonis prison. Everyone was looking at me. fabulous!

At first I thought it was heaven. How great it was to be able to look upon my superb looks every hour of the day? I thought I look even better in prison than I do outside. I am one of those lucky people who get better looking every day.

But after the fifth month it began to get monotonous. I could spot every single feature. Even perfection can look tedious if you look long enough at it. I grew tired of looking at myself all the time. I began to hate seeing myself everywhere. I found I was avoiding myself and staying in bed. I tried to keep my eyes shut in my cell to avoid catching a glimpse of my chiseled features.

I found that when I walked past the mirror I no longer had the urge to look at myself or take selfies.

Five years came round. It felt like five hundred. I was ready for release. Just got to go to the Artemis room for the final procedure. They strap you down as a machine cuts a big scar into your face from your ear to your jaw. They couldn’t take any chances with my astounding good looks.

I’ve been out of Adonis prison for a while now. My face is no longer perfect. It looks scary. I suppose they had to do it as I was so dishy before. It wasn’t fair on the rest of the world to have to look upon my stunning beauty. I no longer excessively love myself or admire myself. In fact I hate the person I was. He was so vain. I no longer look at mirrors or have taken a selfie in years. I wasted so much time looking at myself. I am much more productive now.

I’m glad I’m cured.

About the author: Simon is a writer from England who likes to write stories.